My goal for tomorrow will be not to yell. I have already screamed and yelled today, so I think tomorrow is a good day to start. They are just being kids, after all, right? Sounds good and I will let you know how well that goes.
Today started out surprisingly well, but something happened around 3pm. I don't know what or how, but I began to feel blue again. A little manic, wouldn't you say? It was beyond my control and I think maybe I just need more water. It also may be because I know the kids have a half day tomorrow and I truly need them to be in school until 2:40. I function better with that routine. I do not have a type A personality, but this is the only thing I need not to change from week to week. I earned those hours. There were many days when I did not leave the house (when they were little) and took care of only them and Andy, not Johna.
Not sure if I will hit a meeting tonight, although I know I should probably go. There isn't a specific Thursday meeting that I have found that I like. Maybe I should try a new one. I don't know. It gets dark so early and sometimes it is nice to cozy down on the couch in sweats and veg in front of the TV. Speaking of, I think I found my new favorite show..."Life". There is just something about the lead character that I love. So much so he was in one of my dreams.
Today I am grateful for being sober, coffee, the car being covered (partially) under warranty, my school duties taken care of until after our vacation, great friends, and those crazy kids.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
10 comments:
yell into the pillow! it's very therapeutic. good luck you!
The twelve steps are (as Mr. Wilson used them) given as an answer (a way) in which one can overcome sin (with Mr. Wilson's case, the sin of drunkenness). Jesus Christ is the ONLY answer for sin. He is the only way (John 14:6). There is only ONE "step", and that is faith in the Savior (Ephesians 2:8/Matthew 1:21/John 8:36/Romans10:13)! The above exemplifies the "twelve steps" are what are used to "become free from addictive, compulsive" behavior (i.e. sin). In other words, the twelve steps are the savior! No doubt it is deceptive, because "Biblical principles" are interwoven throughout; but if they weren't, few (if any) would be deceived. One good question to ask would be, "Where does Scripture talk about any 'twelve steps'"? The answer? Nowhere! These twelve steps come from Satan (via Bill Wilson), who is the master deceiver (Revelation 12:9). Remember, Satan used Scripture to tempt Christ (Matthew 4:6), and Balaam spoke much truth (Numbers 23-24); but he was a false prophet (2 Peter 2:15-16/Numbers 22). In Matthew 7:13-14 Jesus warned, Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it. Jesus likewise warned in Luke 13:24, Strive to enter through the narrow gate, for many, I say to you, will seek to enter and will not be able.
PEACE BE WITH YOU
MICKY
Mr. Bill Wilson, founder of Alcoholics Anonymous (A.A.) and creator of the twelve step program. Mr. Wilson was heavily influenced by demons. Chapter sixteen (p. 275f) of 'Pass It On' The Story of Bill Wilson and how the A.A. message reached the world records Mr. Wilson's use of the ouija board, participation in seances, psychic events, "spook sessions", table levitation, and how he would receive "messages" from "discarnate" spirits. Bill Wilson was clearly in contact with demons, and this is the man who created the deceptive twelve step program. Make a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. (step #11. Emphasis added.) The last part of this statement ("as we understood Him") is enough to damn your soul! God says, Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. (Proverbs 3:5). This is the exact opposite of "God as we understood Him." All men, according to Romans 1:18-32, are condemned before God, because they rely upon their own understanding (Romans 1:21; Ephesians 4:18, "having their understanding darkened"), and they create (in their own darkened minds) a god of their own making (Romans 1:23). To encourage people to turn their "lives over to the care of God as we understood Him", is to encourage people to "turn their lives over to a god of their own making" (i.e. according to their own understanding). This promotes nothing more than spiritual death (Revelation 22:15). In addition, these twelve steps are a deceitful attack against the saving work of the Lord Jesus Christ (i.e. they are against Christ, antichrist, 2 John 7; Colossians 2:8-10).
PEACE BE WITH YOU
MICKY
THE 12 STEPS DOWN TO HELL
I imagine 12 Step recovery programs are a slow slide into the jaws of Satan. I was involved with this evil “satanic cult” [AA] for over 30 years but was saved through the power of Jesus Christ. He directed me to a therapist who was into “real” recovery, not the mind destroying, soul destroying, cult, which is AA. I have met two Steppers recently & I imagine they are completely devoid of any emotion or insight. I feel pain because both these men are decent human beings but AA has destroyed their BRAIN STRUCTURE & they have no idea how to relate apart from expounding AA propaganda. I imagine Hell to be a continuous flow of AA meetings without any light at the end of the tunnel because one never recovers'. I beg you people who are in 12 Step programs, to get out before it is too late.
How does one recover when one is handing one’s power over to AA. The 12 Steps were written out of Wilson’s head, he certainly didn’t get his guidance from the Bible. I imagine he was an agent of Satan & he & Smith’s “cult religion” has filled millions of Steppers with their anti - Christ propaganda.
Step Three of AA is "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him." While many in the Oxford Group placed their faith in Jesus Christ as Lord and Saviour, there was much leeway given. Shoemaker, a leader of the Oxford Group, says, "The true meaning of faith is self-surrender to God." He further explains:
Surrender to whatever you know about Him, or believe must be the truth about Him. Surrender to Him, if necessary, in total ignorance of Him. Far more important that you touch Him than that you understand Him at first. Put yourself in His hands. Whatever He is, as William James said, He is more ideal than we are. Make the leap. Give yourself to Him.
Aside from capitalizing the "H," which Christians do to refer to the God of the Bible, "Him" could refer to any god of one’s own making [BEDPAN].
Can you see what is happening to you? Ask Jesus to take control of your lives, read the Bible & instead of 12 Step groups, go to Church. Burn your Big Book or use it as toilet paper. Can you see the difference: With The 12 Steps, you never recover but with John 3:16 you are guaranteed Eternal Salvation. The “ball is in your court”?
Peace Be With You
Micky
DETESTABLE NECROMANCER
You know, the message the 12 Step Paradigm tells us that we are all just powerless over our addictions, meaningless specks of offal in an endless ocean of space and matter where hydrogen atoms and bacteria of unexplained origin can turn into god as
you understand him!! Oooo! It’s so exciting and uplifting to be regularly assured by Steppers in all their ineffable knowledge and function is just an accumulation of 1st Century Christianity Buchmanism & Nihilism. Oooo! It’s heart-warming, I’ll tell ya. We owe these "messengers" so terribly much that it is difficult to put into words... We can talk to dead people & consult spiritists.
9 When you enter the land the LORD your God is giving you, do not learn to imitate the detestable ways of the nations there. 10 Let no one be found among you who sacrifice his son or daughter in the fire, who practices divination or sorcery, interprets omens, engages in witchcraft, 11 or casts spells, or who is a medium or spiritist or who consults the dead. 12 Anyone who does these things is detestable to the LORD, and because of these detestable practices the LORD your God will drive out those nations before you. 13 You must be blameless before the LORD your God [Deuteronomy 18: 9-13]
Wilson was a “detestable necromancer” who talked to dead people & consulted spiritists. He was “an angel of light” and if you Steppers want what he had, keep going to 12 Step meetings & end up as zombies. I beg of you to see the True Light [John 3: 16] & have Eternal Life, not death [12 Steps].
Peace Be With You
Micky
Jody K Shares
Commonly known out here in cyberspace as "Sugah," origins mostly by now forgotten, my name is Jody K. I have been on this journey for a modest stack of 1,725 twenty-four hour days, impressive when I look at it until I remember what a small number that is compared to the ones spent under the thumb of King Alcohol (and the various members of his loyal court). So, that being said, I am still very new at all this, still discovering things, small truths and doing my best to apply them to my life.
micky Said:
Dear Sugah
I beg you, to get out of AA, before it destroys you. The only way to SALVATION, is through the saving Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ. These other 12 Step BLOGGERS (DEMONS) - soberchick, shadow & pam , are emotionally shutdown, terrified little children, who don't want to face the truth about themselves. You have the courage - through the power of the HOLY SPIRIT, to TRANSFORRM yourself and become a witness for Christ, not SATAN (AA).
I will be praying for you Jody!
PEACE BE WITH YOU
MICKY
Fireman John Said;
I look at recovery as a structure, built on a foundation; the strength of the foundation is reinforced through meetings, asking for help and admitting that no matter the challenge, there is nothing that a drink will solve or change.
Anxiety does occur as a result of fear and uncertainty, but it can be managed by a positive and grateful attitude. As long as we remember to stay vigilant and moving forward, there isn't anything we can't cope with.
Micky Said:
Greetings John
Your comments don't make any sense, Jack!! (Anxiety does occur as a result of fear and uncertainty, but it can be managed by a positive and grateful attitude.). Anxiety is fear, Johnny. Are you suffering from smoke inhalation, Johnny? The only way you will be SAVED, is John 3:16? I suggest you burn your BIG BOOK or keep it in your toilet - just in case you run out of TOILET PAPER. Buy yourself a BIBLE and start reading God's word, not Wilson's satanic verses (BIG BOOK). I love you, Johnny! Do you love me, Jack? Are you FROTHING at the mouth, reading my comments, Jack? Are you on FIRE, Johnny? Give yourself a good HOSING down. HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!
PEACE BE WITH YOU
MICKY
THE SACRED BULL
I imagine 12 STEPPERS have sold their souls to the devil. Fortunately, I was saved through the power of Jesus Christ, but for many years had been exposed to the evil “satanic cult” (Alcoholics Anonymous) Wilson (AA) has prostituted himself & deluded many thousands (12 Step Groups) by worshipping the god Moloch (Ba’al the Sacred Bull). It all started with his (Wilson) “drug induced hallucination”….
Here are references to seances and other psychic events….
Bill would…”get” these things …long sentences, word by word would come through….” (22)
,he asked for guidance….The words began tumbling out with astonishing speed….(23)
So A.A.’s 12 Steps were actually received verbatim from the demonic world. It is not surprising, then, that the effect of A.A. upon many of its members is to lead them into occult involvement. In 1958, Wilson wrote to Sam Shoemaker,
Throughout A.A., we find a large amount of psychic phenomena, nearly all of it spontaneous. Alcoholic after alcoholic tells me of such experiences… run nearly the full gamut of everything we see in the books.
In addition to my original mystical experience, I’ve had a lot of such phenomenalism myself.(24)
Wilson’s “original mystical experience” was his alleged “conversion” –a classic occult encounter: “Suddenly the room lit up with a great white light. I was caught up into an ecstasy…it burst upon me that I was a free man…a wonderful feeling of Presence, and I thought to myself, ‘So this is the God of the preachers! ‘ A great peace stole over me….”(25)
This was not the “God of the preachers” but the one who transforms himself “into an angel of light” (2 Cor 1l:l4)-a light that often transforms those involved in the occult. The experience was so profound that Wilson never touched alcohol again. Satan would he more than willing to deliver a man from alcoholism in this life if thereby he could ensnare him for eternity and inspire him to lead millions to the same destruction!
Wilson joined the Oxford Group and regularly attended its meetings at Calvary Church (NY), pastored by Episcopalian Sam Shoemaker. Shoemaker urged his hearers to “accept God however they might conceive of him….”(26) Here was the origin of Step 3’s “God as we understood him.” God does not respond to those who call upon false gods. Jesus said, “And this is life eternal, that they might know thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent” (Jn 17:3). God’s judgment comes upon them “that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ (2 Thes 1:8).
I will set my face against that man & his family & will cut off from their people both him & all who follow him in prostituting themselves to MolechI will set my face against the person who turns to mediums & spiritists to prostitute himself by following them, & I will cut him off from his people. (Leviticus 20: 5, 6)
Moloch the God Ba’al, the Sacred Bull, was widely worshipped in the ancient Near East and wherever Carthaginian culture extended. Baal Moloch was conceived under the form of a calf or an ox or depicted as a man with the head of a bull.
Hadad, Baal or simply the King identified the god within his cult. The name Moloch is not the name he was known by among his worshippers, but a HebrewMoloch (in the Septuagint Greek translation of the Old Testament), or Molech (Hebrew), is no different than the word Melech or king, transformed by interposing the vowels of bosheth or ’shameful thing’. translation. The written form.
He is sometimes also called Milcom in the Old Testament.
I beg you Steppers to to get out while you can (12 Step) or end up as emotionally shutdown, hissing, creeping, shape - shifting, Bill Wilson ZOMBIES.
Peace Be With You
Micky
THE SACRED BULL
I imagine 12 STEPPERS have sold their souls to the devil. Fortunately, I was saved through the power of Jesus Christ, but for many years had been exposed to the evil “satanic cult” (Alcoholics Anonymous) Wilson (AA) has prostituted himself & deluded many thousands (12 Step Groups) by worshipping the god Moloch (Ba’al the Sacred Bull). It all started with his (Wilson) “drug induced hallucination”….
Here are references to seances and other psychic events….
Bill would…”get” these things …long sentences, word by word would come through….” (22)
,he asked for guidance….The words began tumbling out with astonishing speed….(23)
So A.A.’s 12 Steps were actually received verbatim from the demonic world. It is not surprising, then, that the effect of A.A. upon many of its members is to lead them into occult involvement. In 1958, Wilson wrote to Sam Shoemaker,
Throughout A.A., we find a large amount of psychic phenomena, nearly all of it spontaneous. Alcoholic after alcoholic tells me of such experiences… run nearly the full gamut of everything we see in the books.
In addition to my original mystical experience, I’ve had a lot of such phenomenalism myself.(24)
Wilson’s “original mystical experience” was his alleged “conversion” –a classic occult encounter: “Suddenly the room lit up with a great white light. I was caught up into an ecstasy…it burst upon me that I was a free man…a wonderful feeling of Presence, and I thought to myself, ‘So this is the God of the preachers! ‘ A great peace stole over me….”(25)
This was not the “God of the preachers” but the one who transforms himself “into an angel of light” (2 Cor 1l:l4)-a light that often transforms those involved in the occult. The experience was so profound that Wilson never touched alcohol again. Satan would he more than willing to deliver a man from alcoholism in this life if thereby he could ensnare him for eternity and inspire him to lead millions to the same destruction!
Wilson joined the Oxford Group and regularly attended its meetings at Calvary Church (NY), pastored by Episcopalian Sam Shoemaker. Shoemaker urged his hearers to “accept God however they might conceive of him….”(26) Here was the origin of Step 3’s “God as we understood him.” God does not respond to those who call upon false gods. Jesus said, “And this is life eternal, that they might know thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent” (Jn 17:3). God’s judgment comes upon them “that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ (2 Thes 1:8).
I will set my face against that man & his family & will cut off from their people both him & all who follow him in prostituting themselves to MolechI will set my face against the person who turns to mediums & spiritists to prostitute himself by following them, & I will cut him off from his people. (Leviticus 20: 5, 6)
Moloch the God Ba’al, the Sacred Bull, was widely worshipped in the ancient Near East and wherever Carthaginian culture extended. Baal Moloch was conceived under the form of a calf or an ox or depicted as a man with the head of a bull.
Hadad, Baal or simply the King identified the god within his cult. The name Moloch is not the name he was known by among his worshippers, but a HebrewMoloch (in the Septuagint Greek translation of the Old Testament), or Molech (Hebrew), is no different than the word Melech or king, transformed by interposing the vowels of bosheth or ’shameful thing’. translation. The written form.
He is sometimes also called Milcom in the Old Testament.
I beg you Steppers to to get out while you can (12 Step) or end up as emotionally shutdown, hissing, creeping, shape - shifting, Bill Wilson ZOMBIES.
Peace Be With You
Micky
After that....I am "wordless"! Holy Moly! Sounds like I need an exorcism... That's enough to drive me back to DRINK! Sorry, I just had to comment.
The greatest gift, I received from practicing the principles of AA...was OPEN MINDEDNESS. Therefore, if you find sobriety, by following Micky's sugestions, and are happy, joyous and free; HALLELUJAH!
Johna,
The only reason I participate in this "blog" is to help you find the serenity you seek...I care not whether, you are Jewish, Bhuddist, Islamic, Hindu, Heathen, Democrat, Republican, Nudist or even Christian. I really don't even care if AA is your path...It is, however, the one that I am most familiar with and what worked for me. I have been frustrated with you, on occasion. My bad! Why should I care, so deeply? I have NOW learned, to "try" and hold "compassion" in my heart/mind for ALL people, from ALL places at ALL times. Through the STEPS, I learned how to love myself again. To forgive ME! In order to comprehend this process, I had to be "clear" headed and connected to the Creator, in a very personal way. There may have been a time, MANY years ago, when I could have found "today's" happiness while still having an "occasional" drink. Many still do (social drinkers) but, NOW I know I can't! I missed that MOMENT of understanding. Today, my "high" is...LIFE! Talk about a "segue"...
Thanks, for reminding me about "Life". I had caught the end of the 1st episode and was intrigued. YOU prompted me to watch the first 2 episodes, rebroadcast on USA, this past Saturday. His lack of "resentment", after false imprisonment, is a model every human should strive for...including AAs! I love the spiritual "undercurrent" of the show. Was I in a "false" prison of 31yrs of drinking? I will follow every episode "with you". We are connected! Living in PRESENT, is my way of "life". It requires constant "attention" to maintain.
Two shows, which helped me, in early recovery were, "House" and "Rescue Me". Watching an addict and an alcoholic, throw their insatiable EGOS around every week was most enlightening. I found myself laughing at ME! Even in the most dire of circumstances...I identified with them. I recommend seasons 3 and 4 of "Rescue Me", in particular...you might be able to rent the DVDs?
As to your "3pm" problem, I would suggest that "food" rather than water was more likely the cause of your discomfort. We are hyper-sensitive to fluctuations of blood sugar in the early going. Did you read the link on PAWS? Please indicate you have, in your next entry...a little feedback would be nice.
I hope you are doing well and "survived" this weekend. I DO care about you...you are indeed loved!
"PAWS"...PLEASE READ!!!!
http://www.hopelinks.net/addiction-treatment/post-acute-withdrawal.html
Micky...take care of yourself. You are loved, too.
Post a Comment